Money can't buy everything.

Well, I did my best. I bought a stake to put in the yard and two metal chains to keep the vicious killers in control. They got the birds anyway, both of them. Very sad. They brought them and left them on the doorstep. They did it for me, that's the worst part. That and now besides just having gross breath they have gross, dead bird has been in there, kind of breath.

You did what now?

Me: Hey I have a question for you, so I killed a sage and I was just looking for something to
Garden center lady at HEB: You did what now?
Me: I killed a sage
GCLAHEB: Really? Hank, Hank, come here, this lady killed a sage?
Me: I mean, technically it could have been the people we bought the house from (flash back to buying the house in perfect condition with perfect plants and perfectly painted doors...), it kind of died right after we moved in, so it might have been them (my nose grew about three inches). So why is it so funny to kill a sage?
GCLAHEB: No, no it's just that sages are really hard to kill, so I wouldn't buy that if I were you (she said as she pointed to the pretty little white flowery thing I was getting to replace the sage).
Me: Oh, well, yeah, I just.....well she (motioning to Gwen) really liked it so I just put it in my cart while I was looking for something more hardy.
GCLAHEB: Yeah, I hope so because that is a tropical plant so you would have to dig it up each year before it would freeze.
Me: Yeah, obviously. So, where are the sages?

Not only did I kill the sage, but I also killed the flowers I originally got to replace the sage.

Kristi VS Gardening Round III pray for me.

Fledgling

The other night I was walking home from a neighbors house (I've been feeding their dog while they are away), and as I passed our next door neighbors lawn I noticed a little baby bird sitting in the grass. Well, last year we had noticed a baby bird in our yard and didn't do anything and the neighborhood cat had gotten it by the next morning. The nurturer in me couldn't just sit idly by and let the same fate befall this cute little bird. So I found a tupperware box and fashioned a grass little nest in there and scooped the bird up inside.

Later that night I researched online what one should do if you "rescue" a bird, and was surprised to learn that most birds that are "rescued" are unnecessarily rescued. Apparently when a bird is a "fledgling" it falls out of the nest and hangs around for a few days or a couple of weeks, with the parents still keeping track of it, until it learns to fly. Whoopsie. I read further that it is a myth that if you touch a baby bird its mother will reject it (dodged that bullet), so I went and put the bird back where I had found it.

Imagine my surprise when the next morning I saw the bird belly up in the nieghbors flower bed. I am a baby bird killer.

So last night I was out playing with the dogs and I heard a loud chirp when I was near our tree. I looked and found a birds nest about eye level in our little tree. I made Blaine give me a shoulder ride so I could see in the tree. Nothing. No birds.

A little while later I noticed Swiper in hunters stance growing at the base of the tree. I went over to find two little fledglings in the grass. As soon as I moved the grass that was covering them they opened their mouths wide for some wormage. It was very cute. Unfortunately miniature schnauzers are bred to hunt small pray like mice and squirrels and so the dogs #1 goal in life is to attack these little birds, and now I feel personally responsible for their well being.

So how am I going to make it for however long these birds are on the ground without letting my dogs outside unattended? I am not sure. But those baby birds will be safe dang it.

Wish me luck!

6 hours and counting

As if it is not scary enough having your baby nearly drown in the bathtub, now I have to worry about him for an additional 24 hours. Seriously. I was sitting right next to the tub looking at something besides the tub (my camera ?) when I heard a thunk and looked to find Bentley face down in the water. I snatched him out immediately but he didn't breath for a few seconds. It was scary! I mean, I knew he should be okay, he wasn't under for more than one or two seconds at most, but man, very scary. He and Gwen were both very freaked out after the fact. I got him settled down and taking a nap and Gwen watching a show. I was reading the news about an hour later when I came across this article.

Dry drowning? You've got to be kidding me. And the things you are supposed to look out for?

1. Excessive tiredness
2. Mood changes
3. Difficulty breathing

Well, Bentley went right to sleep after the incident, and had raspy breathing (he has a slight cold and has always been quite nasally while breathing). My heart started beating so fast I thought it would beat right out of my chest. I felt all light headed and EXTRA nauseous. I mean, was it a sign that I saw this article?

It may seem a bit odd if I grab my son and haul him to the ER and say that I thought he might be dry drowning. I don't know.

So I have sat here all day with him never more than an inch away, watching for the signs. It's really hard to tell if he has any of the three as it would be for any infant I am sure. All I know is that it has been 6 hours and I can't wait for the next 18 to be over!

And I feel so sad for that kid and that mother. What an awful thing to happen. I had no idea, just like she said, that such a thing existed. Except I think maybe I saw an episode of House about it. Anyway, just a shout out to all you moms out there to know that this is a real thing and to watch your kids after swimming. I know, you needed another thing to worry about it, but knowledge is power, right?

Let the nausea begin!

Don't worry, I'm not pregnant. I just booked our flights to Salt Lake for our trip and so now I will be in a constant state of distress until I am safely back on the ground in Austin in about a month and a half. Aren't you proud of me? You maybe don't realize what a big deal it is for me to do this, and I guess it isn't done, but I scheduled (well, I told my dad to schedule) our flights. Utah here I come (I hope). And pray for my sanity in the upcoming weeks. It really is hard for most people to understand, but when I think about flying I become totally non-functional.

I think I may go seek medical attention (uh....drugs) to see if they can give me something to help, but it would be sad because I am pretty sure I would have to wean Bentley. Oh the trauma, I wish this wasn't such a big deal to me.

Please don't tell me how safe flying is, I know that. This fear is hard wired baby. You can tell me how safe I will be though and how much fun I am going to have and how there will not be storms on the day we are supposed to fly out.

Oh dang, the hyperventilation is starting.

Wally World

I know there is a big controversy over whether one should shop at wal-mart or not. I am definitely anti-monopoly. I don't like that wal-marts prices are so low that they are stomping out the competitors and eventually when all of the Winco's, HEBs, Albertson's and Smiths are gone wal-mart will rule the world and jack up all of the prices. On the other hand though, I love that everything is cheaper at wal-mart (almost) and that I can get everything I need in one stop. Not only that but then if my tire goes flat whilst I am shopping they can repair it on the spot and I practically don't miss a beat.

Still everytime I set out to go grocery shopping I have this moral debate raging in my head. HEB or Wal-Mart. Wal-Mart is cheaper, HEB has better produce and meat. I can buy toothpaste at wal-mart, I can buy the same toothpaste for double the cost at HEB. HEB is local, wal-mart is the big bad corporate bully. Oh the torment. I never decided until I get to the fateful intersection where you have to turn Left to go to HEB and Right to wal-mart. Even then my blinker has been known to change sides midway through the turn.

Wal-Mart usually wins, and I usually feel bad about that, but I enjoy the financial savings. And hey I can open a banking account, get my eyes examined, photos taken, nails done, hair cut, a pedicure, eat lunch, and should my appendix burst, I am sure they have a place to get it removed right there as well. Can't beat that for convenience.

So let it be known that I am morally opposed to wal-mart, but I do still shop there (so I guess I am not that opposed, maybe after Blaine gets a raise I can be).

Anyway, so if you can bring yourself to shop at wal-mart, have I got news for you. I found the worlds BEST wal-mart. For the sake of keeping my location somewhat anonymous I will just say it was not in the city I live in and it was a totally "pfun" drive "pfor" our "pfamily" to visit (you with me Austinites?).

The reason it was the best wal-mart ever?

* Right as you walk in the McDonalds was open and bright, and though I am also morally opposed to McDonalds, they offered a bag of popcorn and drink for $2 (or either for $1) and if you haven't figured it out yet, giving your toddler a bag of popcorn while shopping is the most brilliant idea ever. They want to sit in the cart, they keep their big yappers shut and they keep their greasy little fingers in their bag or in their mouth. Genius.

* They had the store organized in a way that actually made sense. I hate how grocery stores put their fresh stuff, then freezer stuff, then canned stuff, then fridge stuff. By the time you get to your milk, which was the only thing you really needed anyway, all of your freezer stuff is melted and dripping puddles of goo on your other stuff. To combat this I usually head to the back of the store first and work my way forward. This wal-mart though had the freezer stuff in back by the refrigerator stuff. So smart. Except I did my little trick, because I didn't know, and wound up with melted stuff anyway.

* There were clearance racks EVERYWHERE.

* Stuff was actually on sale, as opposed to "rolled back". Got some good, melted, ice cream for $2.50 (has anyone else noticed that Dreyers halved the size of their containers and charge the same amount....*shaking fist to the heavens*, I'm no dummy, it's not like I didn't notice.....too bad they have the best ice cream with the fewest calories. So I still buy it).

* The lights in the freezer section were motion activated so if people weren't standing looking at a freezer the light turned off. Brilliant! In these times of energy crises I just think that was a cool little touch.

* They had wal-mart brand baby food. I swear they don't have that at the other walmarts I frequent.

* Everyone was so dang nice. Seriously, there was a good spirit.

* Produce was fresh and organized and felt cold and there weren't fruit flies buzzing around everywhere.

Anyway, if you are every looking pfor a pfantastic shopping experience, contact me and I will tell you where this wal-mart is (if you didn't get the hints ;) .

---stay tuned for my next exciting post, the $50 tomato the size of a marble------

Putting myself out there..

Have you ever had a garage sale? Oh my word, it is so humiliating. There you are, your whole life is laid out on your driveway. Then people come and sift through all of your stuff and toss it aside, like it doesn't even mean anything. They make comments and stiffle little giggles. You're thinking "What? It was in STYLE back then, I swear!". All the while you have to sit there in your little lawnchair and try to avoid making eye contact. Oh, it is so awful. All those beautiful outfits that have so many memories for Gwen? No one cares. They weren't even worth a dollar to them. I totally expected to hear squels of delight..."OH! What a BEAUTIFUL dress! What exquisite taste this woman must have to dress her daughter so tastefully.". Nope.

Then you can't help but wonder if the reason no one bought your exercise equipment is because they took one look at you and decided it must not work. Ouch.

And then there's the people who drive by and peer down their nose at the stuff on your lawn while driving slowly and then speed away. What? My stuff's not good enough for ya? Huh? Huh? You wanna piece of me? (no, they don't that's why they didn't stop).

I do that too though, so I guess I can't blame them.

I don't think I can stomache another garage sale, ever. I don't even know how much money we made, I just know it wasn't worth it. Too much work and discomfort. Oh, the whole thing is horrendously awkward.

I just know the next time I go to a garage sale, I will make little exclaims of how wonderful all of their stuff is, even if I don't buy anything. Just so they'll know that they have lived a worthwhile life.

It really is hard to lay it all out there for everyone to sift through. Be nice to garage sale people, they've been through a lot.